Goal 3: Taking on the World

For those of you who are fans of the Goal movie series, following the football tribulations of Mexican immigrant superstar Santiago Munez, prepare for a big disappointment.

While the first two installments -- Goal: The Dream Begins and Goal II: Living the Dream -- are widely considered to be in the top five of great soccer flicks, the final movie in the trilogy should be red-carded and sent to the locker rooms.

Directed by Andy Morahan, and written and produced by Mike Jefferies from the first two Goal films, Goal! 3: Taking on the World will not have a theatrical release and was instead released straight to DVD and Blu-ray in the UK on June 15, 2009. The release date for North America has not been announced. Can you say budget issues?

From the movie's plot description (and the vast amount of hugely horrible reviews online) none of the open-ended plotlines from the first two films are followed up. In fact from what I have read, the series' main character Munez doesn't even play a significant role in the finale. He never makes the World Cup. Also, unlike earlier films, there are no football star cameos ... only stock footage of World Cup action is used. And all acted football action is green screened.

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(From Wikipedia)

In the third installment of the football drama trilogy Goal!, Kuno Becker returns as Mexican footballer Santiago Munez, who along with his best friends and England national team players Charlie Braithwaite (Leo Gregory) and Liam Adams (JJ Feild), are selected for their respective national teams at the 2006 FIFA World Cup Finals in Germany.

However, as the three attend the shooting of a film Braithwaite is featured in, tragedy befalls them. All 3 best friends and Braithwaite's new love interest and soon to be fiancee Sophia Rossi (played by Kasia Smutniak) suffer a car accident which puts Munez out of contention through injuries. Meanwhile, Liam Adams discovers to his horror that he has a new daughter, Bella, from former love interest June (played by Anya Lahiri). This only adds to Liam's preexisting alcoholism and release from Real Madrid. It is revealed that Munez is set to return to England as a Tottenham Hotspur player under a 2 year contract, along with Adams, who resigns with Newcastle United, the original club of both ex-Real players. The film goes on to depict the World Cup from the English perspective. Liam scores the winner against Sweden, assisted by a header from Charlie, and England successfully qualify for the knock-out stages. However, in the match against Ecuador, Braithwaite is injured, and dies on the way to the hospital, the result of a brain aneurysm suffered during the car accident in the beginning of the film. Italy beat France on penalties in the final to take home the crown of champions of the world.

England crash out of the quarterfinals against Portugal, as Adams, visibly shaken by Braithwaite's death, misses a crucial penalty against Portuguese keeper Ricardo while Cristiano Ronaldo converts. Despite the loss, the movie ends on a high note, as Adams weds June, together among friends again.

Also following the tournament around Germany in their St. George’s Cross festooned camper van are the ‘Geordie Boys’, whom we first met back in Goal!. Providing the entertaining fans' perspective of the matches are Newcastle United diehards Gordon (Mike Elliott), Foghorn (Christopher Fairbank), Walter (Jack McBride) and Phil (Craig Heaney) in their drunken, womanizing adventures in Germany.

Unlike in the first two films, Roz, Glen Foy, and Gavin Harris do not feature in the film, and all actual professional footballers are shown through stock World Cup footage. The sporting role of the actors' in this film is limited to the green screen.

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You can purchase a PAL version of the movie from Amazon UK, or scroll through the long list of pitiful one-star reviews and just put this one out to pasture.